I followed the previous posts and did not weigh in on the discussion, but will add my thoughts now if that is OK.
I spent my working career of 32 years as a high school science teacher (Biology and Physics). In a suburban school of about 2500 kids. I had the full spectrum of lazy and didn't care, all the way up to high achievers enrolled in my Advanced Placement Physics (who at the end of the year could test out for a full year of college physics credit). I was dept head for 13 years, leading a dept of 12 science teachers. Point I'm making is: I've probably seen it all.
In working with kids, and especially Seniors, they want to try some new and different things. Usually the brighter kids are more willing to stray from the "normal". They have more self confidence and are more willing to accept others who are also "different". Conducting classes with such groups is like being in charge of the Kentucky Derby. You can encourage them to do their best, and often that is better than even I could imagine. Or you can crush their spirit, and they will run the race just like any other $200 20 year old horse. I truely enjoyed encouraging them to stretch their legs and go for the big prize. It really made teaching fun.
Now the part about rules and school administrators... The brightest of teachers generally enjoyed being damm good classroom teachers. The not so brightest (and thus burned out teachers) went to a couple of summer school classes and some night classes and put on the "sport coat" of Vice Principal or the "suit" of Principal. They would begin our late August teacher workshop with "this year we have 50 new rules, and you all are obligated to enforce them". Then I would rise up from the body of 100 teachers and loudly (to wake up anyone who had already fallen asleep) ask what 50 old rules are we getting rid of, because we already have too many rules. We had rules about the most pickyune stuff! Everyone had to follow the rules or be punished! Well I had enough seniority that couldn't just get rid of me, and I had enough respect among the parents that they would raise heck with the administrators for me when needed. So we sorta got along, their low level of respect for me was mutual.
Now on to the kids... Some of my brightest kids would show up with pink, red, green, blue, blond, orange or jet black hair. I usually met the kids at the classroom door as they came to class a minute or so early. I would make a positive comment on their new hair color, or some article of clothing or jewelry that seemed nice or a new notebook, or some sport or play that they had been successful at. Point is I made coming to class a positive experience, they felt welcome. I usually began the class with some joke or piece of humor, and invited the kids to bring their jokes or humor. This was good for about 30 to 45 seconds, the kids would have a good laugh (or groan!), and would be relaxed a bit and we would get into the heady business of Physics. School rules "everybody has to be in their seat at the end of the bell ringing". I didn't have to enforce a stupid "get on their case" rule that puts the kid in a punitive situation, and projects a negative attitude in the classroom. The kids knew the 1st half minute was "the joke" time and if they were late they totally missed out. A portion of humor is related to its timing, so I never repeated anything for a late comer. The others in the class knew that we were headed right into the lesson, so the "once only" late-comer had to wait for the lunch hour with his or her buddies to find out what everyone was laughing about when they walked in. Point is... rules are made up to "solve problems" that minds with NO creativity can't solve any other way. I anticipated possible problems and tried to solve them with creativity, and respect for my students. Besides it made a much better day for me too. And by June, I had some pretty great students, some of them pulling a full "5" on the AP physics exam.
About your son... he is just experimenting with his own self confidence. Be very thankful it is being expressed with his "daring" hair color. Some kids do their experimenting through s@x, drugs, alcohol, shoplifting, assault of others, and now...guns. As my wife's cousin explained to a group of disapproving relatives about her son's and daughter's extreme hair colors: "It's hair, for God's Sake! Later in life my son will probably be bald just like his Dad. He may as well celebrate and enjoy it now while he still has hair."
Good luck with the school administrators.
Your son will have increased his respect for you for helping and understanding him.
Paul in MN
PS. I had 5 kids go through public school, and 8 grandkids starting their educational journeys. I have been at both sides of the teacher's desk.
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