Graig: I am sorry for your great loss!!! I KNOW the words mean little compared to your pain. I lost my first wife in 1995. She still is in my heart and mind. I find I still see things I want to tell/talk to her about.
Here are somethings I have found in MY life.
1) Keep your focus on your children and make them a large part of your life BUT not all of your life. It is too easy to try and smother them after THEIR loss of their Mother.
2) Morn your wife but do not close your heart. Maybe you will not remarry but you may find another woman to share your life and love with.
3) DO not make your kids life a revolving door of relationships. Only involve your children in a new relationship IF you think it will be a serious one.
4) Be prepared for your children to hate anyone that you try to have a relationship with. They may feel your being disloyal to your wife/their mother by dating again. It will take a special person to love them beside their Mother's love not replace it.
5) You value religion in your life use that yard stick when looking for a another soul mate if you ever do.
6) If you have a good relationship with your in-laws work at keeping them involved in your children's lives. Watch that they do not over compensate for their loss of their daughter but keep them involved.
I wish you well in your life with your children. I feel you will do fine. You seem to have goals that are in keeping with being a good Father and husband. You have faith and that alone helps.
Feel free to email me. I would be glad to be a sounding board if you ever need it.
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