My wife the good samaritan

So I got a call and my wife went to town today and come across a 58 year old woman, my wife said she has dementia, came up to PDC WI looking for her family. The woman is from Monmouth IL, 200 miles away. The wife said she got a hold of the woman's brother but he was of no help, said he tried helping her in the past but gave up said there was nothing he could do for her. My wife is talking about bringing her home for the night and driving her home tomorrow! What kind of things should we be looking out for here? I never dealt with any thing like this before and worried her family maybe some sue happy bunch. Your input is greatly appreciated! The police were not much help in PDC either my wife said.

Email is open, I'm 6 mi. west of Monmouth.

What kind of police do you have??? Disgusting!! Police was my first choice, 2nd would be hospital, social services, etc. By PDC, I assume you mean Prairie du Chiene? How about your county sheriff?

Browm Swiss- What if the woman is telling a story? Maybe she is just looking for someone to give her a free ride to Monmouth IL????

Just a thought......

Dementia is so diverse in its manifestation that your best bet is to call the local human services department (what ever it is labeled) and have them get directly involved. Taking her home could put her in a very bad situation. taking her in could be dangerous to you. Some times imprinting like things happen and you become the new resource. it is really a county/city issue. If there is a county/city resource in Ill, the responsibility should be your county contact's issue. My dad had it and he had absolutely no business in someone's home. Jim

If she truely has dimentia taking her in could be a huge problem. My mother had alzheimers and during different times it was very hard for her to deal with change, at times she would become violent from the confusion. My advice would be to take her to the nearest hospital as they are trained to deal with this. The police should also be prepared to deal with this sort of thing. Not likely anyone in any family services offices today, so that is of no help.

Been there with people like that thankfully there's people out there like you willing to help. But also there is a limit to your experience and abilities. Get her as much assistance as you can contact local church or social services. She might have dementia and maybe it could be something else . I've known people with schizophrenia it can have bad consequences for your family .
Good luck and don't always judge the cops by one bad apple found a loose dog cops took pictures and but on Facebook in an hour they had the owner . In my town there's a lot of cops on power trips but you will find some good people that's why the church might be a good start

I'd call adult protective services,some people in her condition can be very unpredictable and also dangerous I can tell you from experience.

Not sure what you mean: "I got a call and my wife went to town...." There is a lot unsaid here; YOU got a call???? Your wife "Went to town"???

No! No! No! Call law enforcement immediately! If they won't take over, take her immediately to the nearest hospital emergency room! If she needs meds or certain medical service procedures, if y'all keep her and something happens, you will be responsible, and held responsible. Sometimes being a Good Samaritan backfires and it won't be pretty for anyone! Because she has dementia, she is not a responsible person and has medical issues that you are not aware of! Take her to the nearest hospital emergency room now!
Since the local cops don't want to participate, call the Sheriff then the State Police. Then contact all agencies that provide care and services to the elderly disabled adult population in your area. Good luck to all involved!

Scott

Absolutely call police, human services, etc.

Agree that is something goes wrong... her family could sue you. Just a sad but true commentary on life these days.

And YES, dementia and Alzheimer's patients can (and sometime DO), become very violent. You don't want your family to be harmed while you are sleeping.

I use classic and says no email, I will open mine, or can call me at 608 412 356zero.

20 years ago a coworkers wife pickup woman at edge town 16 miles from Monmouth. The unkown person shot and killed her with 5 minutes. Found her body 6 weeks later in Indiana. If you insist on transporting this person take her to nearest hospital. Do not let her in your home or near your family. Do not sign ANY papers at the hospital. Doing so may make you responsible for the bill.

I dont know if i would just bring her home. I think i would call the police or hospital or someone. I mean that is pretty nice of your wife to want to help the Lady and all.

The Farmer's Wifee here,
Well after going round with several police departments who were rather helpful, they finally reached a brother who said he could be of no help. I offered to bring her home as it might rain tonight, but she wouldn't come in fear of being dumped somewhere she doesn't want to be.
It's just a very sad situation. I don't know if she was schizophrenic or dementia or what but her mind was seriously compromised and the memories mixed up. She was set on one thing and one thing only; getting her kids and taking them home. her kids are now 24, 25 and 36 or something like that but I gather they were taken from her and she detained in an institution or something and when she got back, they were gone. Now she wanders in search of this idea of home.
I know many couldn't relate but it is just a sad sad thing.

I just wanted to confirm that there was a person or place to go to and getting her there would be doable, but that does not seem to be the case as it would take an incredible amount of love and energy to make sure she was taken care of. I have a friend since childhood who over saw her Mother's care though the mother was in an institution since I knew the friend at 6 years old. As an adult she had to check in on her even though it was often not pleasant at all and sometimes abusive as her Mother was very schizophrenic. Many times she'd show up and the medications were wrong or she was over drugged and many number of issues to deal with and that is with her being in a care facility much less anyone trying to care for them in their home and work and raise a family etc.

Yeah, I have a soft spot, but someone has to!

I also know of a girl who had several kids by the same guy, never married, and was pregnant when institutionalized and they c-sectioned the baby and took it away. Gave 3 of her kids to relatives who are extreme narcissists, slap them, call them names and make them feel horrible!

There has just got to be better answers than this!

"There has just got to be better answers than this! "

In my (limited) experience, Good Luck with THAT!

Every police dept. and every hospital should have the after hours phone number(s) for Social Services. I would have pushed that angle until someone showed up from an appropriate agency to take charge. Don't take them home. We all pay taxes for Social Services and they need to respond, weekend or not.

I hope things are working out for you still saying prayers for both. I was with a woman for 13 years she was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia and alcoholism yea I like a challenge . It sounds stupid to be with someone like that but we did good her father lived with us till he passed away from cancer. It was extra work to keep an eye on her medication and emotional support. Unfortunately she had kids from a previous marriage and they had there own agenda . They also found out she was a good source for money with government aid that she would have been responsible for. They managed to talk her into going off her medication and she totally flipped out even trying suicide I had to try and get her into the hospital and rebalanced I wish I could tell more but we separated I gave her cash and furniture and within months she had that taken from her and she was living in her car. Some of her family stayed in touch and basically said I did enough even though i wanted to help just let it go . So please be careful it's great that there is kind hearted people like you out there but you can get burned. It hasn't stopped me from helping others but I m more cautious.

You sound like one great lady,,nice to meet you...you and my wife would get along very well,my wife helps everyone she possibly can too.She is at church right now. It sure was nice to meet you..have a great day!!

What Dick2 said exactly.

That's nice of your wife to try and help. But she will not win. Taking her into your home is not a very good idea. The best thing you can do is stay with her and keep after the police or social services to get there and take over. I went threw all of this with my mother. Before we caught on what was going on she still had her car. Oh my god. She would drive off to some place until she ran out of gas then ran the battery down trying to start the car. This happened 3 different times before we got the car away from her. We finally had to get professional help. So don't get into something that will make you very unhappy, And it will.

'there is a severe lack of mental health facilities in the US Prisons are multi billion dollar makers for big business, but mental health is 0. And people wonder why we have crazies running around shooting police.

Wifee here again..
Some may have thought it was a waste of my time, but I did learn some things.

I don't know that I reached the woman or even if listening to her was of much benefit to her. Often simply listening and crying with her, laughing with her; can be a rather healing experience. BUT it was not lost time at all because 3 police departments proved themselves to be very helpful humanitarians, along with a number of individuals who helped and reached out along the way. My heart is warmed and I thank you all for your kindness.

I've seen a number things in my life and even just the spark that someone cares, can make an incredible difference in a person's life to give them hope or motivation to overcome their difficulties.

There are a number of wrongs that contribute to these problems and there is no easy answer.

Mrs. Brown Swiss- Bless you.