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OT-Frustrated dealing with family friends

F

Formerly PaMike

Member
Sorry gotta vent...
Sold 40+ round bales to a friend of mine that was milking cows. We also farmed an 8 acre piece together last year. In Dec he moved to NY to buy a place. Stuck me for all the hay, and all the land rent and expenses on the 8 acres. Can't get a hold of him by mail or phone...$2500+ down the drain.
GMa owns land that surrounds my familys business. GMA is 91. I asked if she wants to sell since we will need the ground for business expansion, and I would like to take care of this now when we have the money. She said yes she would sell, she wants to see the business she started with my GPa continue and prosper. I went ahead and spent $1200 on appraisals so that we could get a fair price since family is involved. Now she says she doesnt want to sell because the banker told her she will have to pay capital gains....
Nothing like loosing 3k-4k from family/friend dealings...
 
That's what families are for!
It took me years to figure out what was really going on, when an uncle, whom I thought was great when I was a child, got so he would just as soon stick it to me when I started renting farm land from him.
 
The thing that kills me about the hay deal is I gave the guy a good price cause he was a friend and I figured one way or another the bill would be taken care of. He wont even call me up and say"I dont have the moeny." I wouldnt care as much about the $$ if he at least had the balls to man up and talk to a friend...
 
You have a good foundation for working with GMa tho!

She is willing to sell, and you have an appraisal.

You need a living trust, irrevocable, set up proper like.

That will let GMa own the property until she dies, then you get it and the tax issues will be much less for her and for you.

Many avenues to this path,takes a lawyer, but it will make things happen for you and her and keep everyone happy.

Paul
 
the best way to do business with friends and family is not at all.My inlaws had a field that I was using and wanted to buy. They always told me that it would be left to me in their will.I purchased the land a few years ago to avoid future problems.When dealing with friends or family do it in a business way get a contract and lawyers.
 
Sounds like a crappy friend. Most of us on here would bend over backwards to make a situation right so that we don't become "that guy" in the county. Some men just don't get it. Stop trying to get ahold of him - it is going to eat you alive every time the phone doesn't get answered.
 
Why is she concerned about that? Explain to her that she won't even spend the balance less the CG. It's now like she goes on Vegas gambling junkets? And remind her YOU are actually paying the capital gains as it comes out of the purchase (money you give her) price.
 
I get along well with my younger brother. We work together and he is my boss at the feed store. We help he other out when we need to and he has my power of attorney.

On the other hand. I have two sisters that I wouldn't trust as far as I could throw them.
 
He won"t talk to you? That"s the clue. Is he really a friend? Sounds one sided to me. It will catch up to him sooner or later.
 
I have learned over the many years of life that a family member or close friend will be the first one to give you the shaft with no grease on it.
 
Do not do business with kin folks or friends. They will expect you to give them everything for free and if there is a problem, they want you to bear the cost, you own more than me, you owe me.
 
My brothers-in-law, nephews, and I have an agreement. Kinship is kinship and business is business. And the two don"t overlap.

In any business dealings, we treat each other like anyone else off the street.
 
Who knows...She makes more money off here rentals every week than I do going to work. She has a steady income stream, and more than enough in the bank. Combine that with the 400k-500k I would be paying her, and she is set. I mean she is 91....
But..the banker convinced her the best way to MAXIMIZE her investment is to hold the land....
 
Don't you love bankers?

Just wondering - is the banker also the executor of her trust? The bigger the trust the more fees they charge.
 
My brother was my buddy as long as I kept "loaning' him money. After he shafted me on a loan that I told him I absolutely needed to be repaid on, I shut him off. The money was part of my kids college fund. After getting screwed out of about $10,000, he didn't want to be my friend anymore when he got shut off.

I haven't spoken to him for 10 years.

Gene
 
Do a Lease with Option to Purchase at the agreed price- You get the use of the land until she dies, then you buy from the estate at the agreed price. No capital gains tax to the estate, as estate gets the stepped-up basis. Get an attorney to do it- documents done on the hood of a pickup are usually worth about what you paid for them.
 
(quoted from post at 18:26:58 06/02/13) The thing that kills me about the hay deal is I gave the guy a good price cause he was a friend and I figured one way or another the bill would be taken care of. He wont even call me up and say"I dont have the moeny." I wouldnt care as much about the $$ if he at least had the balls to man up and talk to a friend...
Click to expand...
ut off eye out of mind.
Seems like he was only a friend as long as you benefitted him.

Been there done that.
 
Yup, Exec of the trust/estate. Bank gets a % of the value of the trust. Don't know if the actual employee also gets paid based on the value or what. Its just hard to believe a banker would advise against selling the land when a family member wants to buy it and is willing to pay an appraised value.
 
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