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OT Mack truck Jokes

A

Anonymous-0

Well-known Member
Anybody know any Mack Truck jokes? I remember my dad who had a B-61 Mack tell me several but I have forgotten most of them. The one I remember best was a fellow said he saw a fellow with three hands because the fellow was driving a Mack and waved at him. (The story was that a Mack took both hands to shift gears.)
Yes, my dad hauled grain all over the central states and he loved his Mack. I have collected several pictures of Mack trucks
 
you know why theres a bulldog on the hood?

so one a$$ can look at another


how about a general truck driver joke......

whats the difference between truck driver boots and cowboy boots?

cowboy boots have the $hit on the outside.
 
"Driving a Mack is like ****ing a ******. It"s okay as long as nobody sees you." You fill in the missing letters. TDF
 

TO ALL; don't knock my bulldog, put about a million miles on mine.I kind or (worked)
on mine and it would put about 6 inchs of
flame out the stack and out run a greyhound bus.
SINGLE STACK MACK WITH A SHACK ON THE BAC
Streakin deacon super star of the diesel car, mother smuckers mother trucker Ken
 
The two most over-rated things in the world are teenage pu**y and Mack trucks.

My apologies to Nancy.
 
i started out driving trucks with a 1959 b-73 mack, 2 stick and it wasn't quick, also it wasn't fast but it sure did last, this is 2009 and i know where the truck is and it still runs fine, but it got even uglier now, you can always tell who drives a b series by his constant bent shoulders and crooked neck
 
For 33 years my dad delivered Internationals from Springfield Ohio to the east and brought Macks back west. When he retired, mom sent a letter to Mack and asked for a bulldog. They sent her this one about 20 years ago.

<a href="http://s92.photobucket.com/albums/l4/acfmmjdcmhihc/?action=view&current=SANY0169.jpg" target="_blank">
SANY0169.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket
</a>
 
Yep i drove several HAIR LIP DUCK's First one was 1957 B60 with a 5&4 and a big old 6 cylinder gas engine pulling lowboy. Yes it took two hands to shift her and ya looked like ya had your hands down in your lunch box most of the time . And a year later it was changed out to a 711 with a turbo . Then a 1970 R700 with a 318 and a 13 speed pulling coal bucket Best truck i ever had coming up out of strip mines and i never had a dozer or loader hooked to her to get me out with 35-45 ton on her back , she may not have been a fast truck as she was flat out at 75 but it pulled good . One of the old saying was KW's Pete's Binders and freight sharker right hand lane on the hill and all Mack's on the berm and do the best ya can
 
I don't know any jokes but I put a lot of miles on them a whole bunch of hours working on them. The first one was a 67 R model we ran it for many years. Twice we pushed it off into the woods and drug it back out and fixed it and used it some more. The third time it stayed till we sent it to the scrap yard not to many a years ago. Still have 4 of them.
Ron
 
true story.#1 climbed into a dm mack one morning, hit my head on the door jam, sat down hit my knee on the steering column, got her lit up, hit my elbow on the back of the cab when i put her in gear! when into the office told the boss the reason there a bulldog on the hood is because the damm cab ani't no bigger than a damm dog house! true story #2 had the tubo hose blow off one time pulling a big hill, thought a jet was crash landing on top of me! could not grab gears quick enough must have drop 3 or 4 gears, must have loss about 100 h.p. yeah good old days.
 
I drive an old Mack to haul silage, It is a very dependable truck. Sometimes I think the cab might fall off, 129,000+ miles. I think its a 1989. I did drive a newer truck , but I prefer this one .Your right about the speed, it is slooooow.
a123987.jpg
 
The joke I remember most about a Mack (and I worked for a company that had 25 "R" models hauling logs/chips at one time!) was about the fellow who lost his air compressor and had no brakes. This was before the advent of emergency brakes that come on below 60 PSI! The fellow was coming down a long mountain grade, lost air and was flying down the hill, only to see a school bus load of kids stopped at the bottom! He looks out across the hood and the ol" bulldog is turned around with his front paws covering his eyes and in desperation(forgetting he"s got no air), the driver yanks down on the air horn cord. He"s going fast enough that the air backs up through the horn and the lines to the air tanks and he"s able to stop the truck within mere feet of the bus!! Now, is that not the biggest bunch of buffalo chips you ever heard? I know there"s a ton of others out there but thats the only one I could come up with at the moment.
 
did not mind shifting with 2 hands. part I never liked was you was shifting all the time, never got done. don't know why they put a high gear in them never had a 2 stick mack in 5th and 4th longer than about 1 min. anyways.
 
lol. i dunno why, it just seems to belong in this thread somewhere..... :)
Convoy
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I used ot work for a guy that would drink all night and be hung over and sleepy next morning. When we left on a call he would go to sleep in passenger seat until we got there. One day heading up I-55 I caught up with a Mack that was being towed backwards by another rig. I eased up real close to it, then blew the horn, yelled and pumped the brakes all at the same time. Less woke up and all he could see was that Bulldog staring at him in the windshield of my van. He never went to sleep riding with me again.
 
A friend drove over the road semis. Early on he learned that even s subitle insult to another driver about the kind of truck that they drove was not a good idea. Tthe comment he made that got him in trouble???. When talking to a mack driver that was following a mile or more behind him, he said. "Well, kick that puppy in the a** and get up here!!!" He never again made a comment that could be taken for an insult.
 
Guys, Ya'll That cuss these ol Dogs have never run one long enough to fall in love with them. On the Convoy clip he runs a ol RS700SL. I ran an ol 1975 Mack Western FS700SL, 220in wheel base. I came to us with a Formula 290 Cummings that had bee punched out to a 350. Had a RTO-9513 behind it with a set of 4.44 Rockwell standards on Hendrickson Suspension. It was one tough truck with a grain trailer or Bull wagon. I have personally crossed our local elevator scales, regularly at 93K to 96Kwith dry wheat or milo. Corn was somewhat less.
That truck was better at a lot of things than other. On heck of a short haul truck. This ol darlin would turn out the work
Later,
John A.
 

If you want to make a bull dog run , hook a
Great Dane trailer to it and let the dane bite
it in the a$$.
One of my buddies that drove mack truck back
in the 50's said he had to keep an extra blanket
in the bunk ,and get it out at every mountain
to cover the dog's eyes so he couldn't see the
hill otherwise he would lie down.

When i started pushing dirt ,I had a loader,
dozer,and three trucks,2 dumps and a tractor.
Tractor was '50 gmc,dumps were '41 int , and
'45 Mack EHX .EHX had an off road duplex that
did not split in order , really did earn those
loads.Ihc had 4 speed and a manual shift eaton
rear( extra shifter in the floor).GMC was 5+2
with air shift rear. In later years I changed
the IH to vacuum shift rear.

george
 
he said off-topic Mack jokes, not off-color Mack jokes. I first heard that joke in West Virginia 20 years ago. If you heard it in Washington, its really made the rounds.
 
Thanks fellows. Dad would have loved them.I think he was insulted about one when a fellow said,"Driving a Mack is like having an aunt in a brothel, Not that bad but nothing to go around telling." I will look for more!
 
Maybe you guys just never had to put a truck to the test. You can't kill Mack's, especially the older ones. I'm talking B Models, DM's, even the R models will run forever. I agree for an over the road tractor the comfort just isn't there, but for construction purposes no other truck even comes close. Who cares about speed when you're fully loaded with gravel, up hill in mud so deep there's an inprint of the rear-ends in the mud, put that quad-box in lo-lo and see you later. No KW or Peterbuilt will be around 40 years from now running strong like those old "B" and "DM" models, I guarentee you that.

Around me there's an old old sand and gravel company that's been around for 100 years, they still run a handful of DM's. I'm not talking the new DM 600 styles they made into the 90's, I'm talking the old DM 800's going back to the 60's with the green interior. All the years the company's been running those they never once broke a quad-box.

REMEMBER: Old Mack's don't die, they just get new drivers
 
Back when I worked on Semi"s we had a driver come in that had added a rod and a plastic hotdog dangling in front of the bulldog on the hood. The bulldog was chasing the hot dog down the road.

I liked the model R"s and the superliners the CH"s weren"t bad either
 
From another member of my otherwise-wholesome barbershop quartet. We didn't use that line in our performances, you'll be relieved to know.
 
This is a working tractor that I just dressed up a little. I've been "following" this dog for many years. He plants pretty straight!
a2165.jpg
 
Why do (insert your hated truck or carrier name here) trucks have one seat in the cab?

So the driver knows where to sit.
 
However, some trucks have two seats, some drivers only know the one way trip out so you have to send along a driver who knows the way back in.
 
(quoted from post at 19:33:02 06/05/09) This is a working tractor that I just dressed up a little. I've been "following" this dog for many years. He plants pretty straight!
a2165.jpg
Click to expand...

You never get the dog chasing the deere? Maybe that adds a few more HP!
 
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